Reported by George Hewitt and Rudi Rannabugardie. Photos by George Hewitt.

The centrepiece of RGS’s Charity Day 2023 was the annual clash between the 1^st XI and the staff football ‘team’. Unsurprisingly, the 1^st Team came out on top, cementing their status as the Kings of the Beautiful Game within RGS.

Countless students lined the Astro, having donated their 50p coins at the gate, thanks to volunteers from Valpy house. The money raised will go towards charities such as Ukraine Unity, proving that football really can make a difference to people’s lives. It soon became apparent that the Staff Team and the 1^st XI were playing in different leagues, 1^st XI member Fraser Vaughan stating, “age doesn’t always equal wisdom”.

Consistent bursts of energy led to the 1^st Team scoring two goals, thanks to Jonty Durie and Alex Turner. When pressed for comment, Durie noted, “first name easy, second name pickings”. It’s clear that the 1^st XI had no doubts in their ability. However, on the staff side, Mr. Williams stated, “I can’t believe we only lost 2-1”.

Possible problems for the staff may have included their lack of team unity, Mr. Wilkes blaming the game on a single teammate – “if it wasn’t for Mr. Dodd, we would have won that game”. The sour feelings are felt both ways, as when pushed for a response, Dodd fired back, “I’m disappointed by Mr. Wilkes’s comment and his general attitude to sport and me”.

Overall, this game was a resounding success, audience member Adam Wang describing it as “exhilarating”, noting the “electrifying atmosphere” and that “it was amazing seeing the School come together for a charitable cause”.

Thanks to Mr. Baker for organising the match, and to Mrs. Rathmell for her continuing contributions to charity at the RGS, and to Valpy for collecting donations and ensuring the smooth running of the event.